


Cockroach Blues

by chibi_zoe



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Losing himself, M/M, Rimming, Youkai Gojyo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-31
Updated: 2014-03-31
Packaged: 2018-01-17 09:13:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1381990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chibi_zoe/pseuds/chibi_zoe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gojyo hasn’t been feeling like himself recently and Kougaiji holds the key to his recovery.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cockroach Blues

Gojyo’s head was throbbing with a massive stomach-churning migraine that started at the base of his skull, moved up past his ears and terminated behind his eyes. On Hakkai’s advice, he’d wrapped a long scarf around his head, over his ears and lower face, and put on a pair of very dark sunglasses, but it wasn’t helping; in fact all it was doing was emphasizing exactly how sensitive his skin was. The scarf was made of silk, but it felt like sandpaper as it shifted in the wind of their passing. 

Every bump in the road felt like it was rattling his spine and he felt overheated then chilled by turns. His clothes were sweat soaked and uncomfortable and he wondered if he was dying. Calling out to Hakkai to stop, he leapt from the jeep and retched painfully beside the road. There was nothing left in his stomach save the bile that burned all the way up and left him with a horrible taste in his mouth. 

“We’re stopping here.” Hakkai told Sanzo, in that particular tone of voice that brooked no argument. His hand was rubbing soothing circles on Gojyo’s back. “Goku, would you please set up the tents?” 

“Sure thing Hakkai.” Goku sounded worried, which didn’t make Gojyo feel any better. Normally the teen would complain about Gojyo faking sickness to get out of working, and now that he thought about it, the monkey had been quiet and remarkably considerate all day. It was weird. Weird wasn’t good.

“Here.” Sanzo thrust a lit cigarette into his fingers and stomped off to ‘supervise the damn monkey’. Gojyo laughed weakly and raised it to his lips to take a deep drag, even the monk was acting strangely. The familiar taste was more intense than usual, so intense that Gojyo coughed in surprise. It had felt like his whole mouth was filled with tobacco, even his teeth. He caught Hakkai watching him and smiled weakly before taking a much shallower puff.

“Try and get some sleep.” Hakkai advised him a short time later as he was tucked snugly into his sleeping bag in the only tent currently erected. Gojyo shivered, cold again despite the warmth of the afternoon sun, and nodded weakly. He wondered what was wrong with him.

“…need to tell Sanzo…” that sounded like Hakkai, “…youkai…dangerous…sick” and that sounded like a too serious version of Goku. It was wrong, the monkey should never sound that serious, he was still a kid after all, he deserved to laugh and scream and pretend that there was nothing wrong with the world, despite their deadly serious mission.

“I’m okay.” He mumbled and then repeated himself a little more loudly when there was no response. “Probably just ate something that I shouldn’t have.” He heaved himself up onto his elbows first, took a deep steadying breath, and then sat up. His head swam and his stomach rumbled ominously.

“Gojyo,” Hakkai started, poking his head into the tent, “you should get some sleep; you’re not well.” Gojyo waved away his concern with a comment about needing to pee and crawled out of the tent. Sanzo was nowhere in sight, but the tent opposite his own was zipped tightly shut. Goku was sitting by the small fire, his face strangely old by the light of the flames.

“Let me help you up.” Hakkai said, rising to his own feet. Gojyo took the proffered hand and rose unsteadily. His head swam dangerously and he swayed, unable to keep his balance without help. Hakkai’s arm slid around his waist to hold him upright. The other man was delightfully warm.

“Stay here Goku.” Hakkai said and Gojyo wondered why, it wasn’t as if the monkey would be at all interested in his bodily functions.

Having someone help him empty his bladder was strange, even if it was only Hakkai who had definitely seen the worst of him already. The other man held him upright and helped him to undo his fly. He did manage to hold his own cock, but Hakkai had to keep reminding him to direct his flow away from their feet. The effort required to keep his mind on the task at hand was enormous.

“Bath?” He mumbled as the last few drops fell from the tip of his penis onto the leaves below. Then he shook his head, they weren’t at an inn, of course they weren’t, inns generally didn’t have leaves in their bathrooms.

“There’s a stream nearby.” Hakkai said, his voice definitely approving and Gojyo smiled weakly. “Okay.”

Their trip to the stream was difficult, Gojyo had trouble walking, his eyes kept fixing on random things around them and then he’d forget to lift his feet. There were bats flying around overhead, small reddish ones with pink noses, and there were hundreds of ants beneath their feet, scurrying along on their endless hunt for food. The world was alive around them and Gojyo had never noticed before. 

When they reached the stream, he was astonished to notice small silver fish darting around in the slowly moving water. He could see the sand of the streambed and the small eddies that the water made around the few rocky obstacles. The water called out to him and he staggered forwards, stumbling out of Hakkai’s stabilising arms and falling to his knees with a thump. He fumbled at his clothes with fingers that stung and struggled to remove his pants without rising to his feet. It was awkward and undignified, but Hakkai kindly said nothing and merely helped him to undress.

“Water.” He slurred as he crawled to the stream bank, water, beautifully cool water to run over his suddenly hot and dry skin. Somewhere behind him he heard Hakkai say something to someone, but he didn’t pay any attention, how could he when the water was so close?

He rolled off the bank and into the stream with a splash, the water caressing him all over and making him feel more alive than he ever remembered being before. He kicked his feet and rose to the surface, taking a deep breath before diving back down again. The water wasn’t deep, if he’d stood up his head would have been above the surface, but that didn’t matter, nothing mattered as long as he could completely submerge himself and let all of his senses experience the wonder of the water.

**--**--**

Hakkai watched Gojyo cavorting in the stream. He’d never seen anything like it before, in fact he couldn’t remember ever having seen Gojyo swim before, but it was beautiful. Gojyo’s long red hair trailed behind him with every movement, like blood red seaweed, his limbs were long and lithe and he moved with a sinuous grace, a grace only normally seen in full blooded youkai. 

The mark on the back of his neck was darker today too, it was getting darker with ever day’s journey further west and it worried Hakkai intensely. He and Goku could both tell that the youkai-ness was getting stronger in Gojyo, although they had both agreed not to tell Sanzo unless the situation became dangerous, and it appeared that Gojyo himself hadn’t noticed the changes yet. He wondered how long it would be before that ignorance became an unacceptable risk.

“You’re right.” Said a voice from the treeline, and Hakkai spun around, his heart in his throat and his chi already gathering in his palms. “His youkai side _is_ rising to the ascendant.” The man continued as if there was nothing wrong. Hakkai let his gathered energy dissipate as the other wasn’t visibly armed, but stayed on his guard, after all they _had_ just fought an epic battle the previous evening.

“Both Dokugakuji and Yaone noticed it yesterday during the battle.” Kougaiji said, striding forwards and seemingly unconcerned with Hakkai’s wariness. “I admit to being far too busy with Goku to pay it much attention. They both wanted to come and help him, but I overruled them. It’s far too dangerous and who knows what the Minus Wave will do to his awakening.” He moved to stand by Hakkai’s side, turning his body slightly so that they could both watch the hanyou as he continued to play in the water. 

“How long?” Hakkai began, not wanting to give voice to the thought that Gojyo might ever lose himself and turn into a ravening beast.

“I am unsure.” Kougaiji said slowly. “Perhaps tonight, perhaps tomorrow morning, perhaps never. What I do know is that he needs to be reminded of exactly who he is; his sense of self must be unwavering.” Hakkai laughed at the words and Kougaiji took his eyes off Gojyo for a moment to look him in the eyes. 

“He’s a gambler and a pervert,” Hakkai said with a fond smile, “but he has a heart of gold and a soft spot for children.” Not to mention an amazing ability to irritate a certain blond monk, and to stay alive when the bullets started flying.

“Ah.” Kougaiji said simply. “Dokugakuji said much the same thing, except that he thought that women might be a bit of a sore spot at the moment.” Hakkai nodded, he could see where Gojyo’s big brother was coming from, he knew all about _Mother_ and what she had done.

“Can you help?” It cost Hakkai a lot to ask, he would have much preferred to help Gojyo on his own, the way that his friend had helped him in his hour of need, but he recognised that Kougaiji would not have come if he hadn’t meant to offer assistance.

“Yes, but I’ll need privacy. You’ll have to go back to camp and leave him with me until dawn.” Hakkai wanted to protest, and he opened and closed his mouth several times as he fought with himself over it, then he turned on his heel and left without a word. His heart was pounding, his stomach was full of butterflies and he had no idea what he was going to tell Goku when he came back alone, but if anyone could help Gojyo fight the Minus Wave, then it was one of the demons who knew how it was created and who wasn’t affected by it.

**--**--**

Kougaiji watched Cho Hakkai stalk back into the dark shadows of the trees, his footfalls tense but unfaltering. The man was showing a lot of trust in him and he didn’t mean to break it. They might technically be enemies, but Kougaiji could recognise an honourable man when he met him. 

“Gojyo?” He called softly, turning to look at Dokugakuji’s little brother. The man didn’t acknowledge him, just continued playing in the water and Kougaiji smiled softly. He had plenty of memories of Dokugakuji cavorting in a similar manner in everything from a bathtub to the ocean, the main exception being that Dokugakuji was normally clothed in at least his underwear. 

Thinking about a particular piece of information that Dokugakuji had imparted, Kougaiji quickly stripped off his own clothes and stepped self-consciously into the stream. The water was shockingly cold and he started to shiver immediately, not relishing the moment when he would have to immerse himself completely.

**--**--**

Goku looked up at Hakkai’s return, Gojyo nowhere in sight. “Hakkai?” He asked, not wanting to voice the question. Hakkai gave him one of his patented fake smiles and a wooden laugh as he reached out and zipped Gojyo’s tent closed. He stood still staring at the empty structure for a long moment before he shook his head and took a seat on the log beside Goku.

“He’ll be fine.” Hakkai said, sounding more like he was trying to convince himself than Goku. “Go to bed Goku, I’ll keep watch.” Goku was reluctant, Gojyo was his friend too, but Hakkai looked like he needed to be alone. 

“If you’re sure Hakkai.” He got up, stopped twice as he tried to think of something comforting to say, and then ducked down to crawl into Sanzo’s tent. 

The monk was wrapped up in his blankets and Goku wondered what his chances were of cuddling up to him without being shot. He could do with some comfort right now, the thought of possibly losing Gojyo, or worse yet of having to fight him, rioted through his mind. 

“Sanzo?” He whispered.

There was no response, so he slipped beneath his blankets and rolled over so that his back was close enough to Sanzo’s chest to feel the heat of his body, wishing with all his might that his foster father would gather him close and just hold him. 

**--**--**

Sanzo woke up as Goku shuffled around getting into his blankets but didn’t respond when the boy called his name. Something was up with Gojyo, something more than the simple virus that Hakkai kept insisting was the problem. Whatever it was had Goku terribly upset, the boy had been uncharacteristically quiet and considerate for the last couple of days. He’d even left food on his plate after dinner and Sanzo couldn’t remember ever having witnessed such a thing in all the years he’d been the boy’s guardian.

When Goku rolled over, almost but not quite pressed up against him, he sighed irritably. Trust the monkey to want comfort when he was complicit with Hakkai in trying to keep him in the dark. Sanzo wasn’t an idiot; it was surely something to do with Gojyo’s youkai side and the wretched Minus Wave. Hakkai and Goku had already been affected by it, although he wasn’t sure that they had realised it yet. 

Their bloodthirstiness during battles with the badly affected youkai was getting noticeably worse, they tried to cover it up with jokes and competitions, but it was still there in the background like the pervasive scent of incense in a temple. Every meal recently had also contained meat, very rare meat the leaked red blood everywhere. Gojyo had eaten every bite with just as much relish as the other two, their lips all stained pink. Sanzo had stuck to ramen and mayonnaise, feeling queasy. 

Sighing again, he put his arm around Goku’s waist and drew him close. The boy made a contented sound as he snuggled into the embrace, his body fitting itself to Sanzo’s with ease and his breathing evening out almost immediately. He’d never admit it out loud, but he found the Goku’s presence in his arms comforting, a reminder of when the boy had been much younger and much more afraid of being alone.

**--**--**

Gojyo turned to watch the intruder as he quickly dunked himself in the stream. The man’s long red hair swirled around him, nearly black in the moonlight. The tan face looked familiar and the red demon marks on his left cheek struck a memory. He struggled with it momentarily before the name rose to the surface. 

“Kougaiji.” He said out loud, pleased with himself, quelling the urge to launch himself at the other man who smelled absolutely divine.

“Gojyo.” Kougaiji replied with a polite nod. Gojyo could see him shivering in the cold water and drifted closer, marvelling at the sight of raised goosebumps covering the tanned flesh and breathing in the delicious scent. “Dokugakuji sends his regards.” Gojyo stopped within touching distance of the other man, the mention of his brother derailing his thoughts.

“Jien?” He said with a smile. He missed Jien, his brother had been the both the bane of his young life and greatest protector, stealing his pocket money in one moment and preventing Mother from beating him senseless the next. He wished that Jien had stuck around after Mother’s death; he really could’ve done with the company. “How is big brother?”

“He’s doing well.” Kougaiji started speaking; describing his brother’s life out Houtou Castle but Gojyo couldn’t concentrate on it. Instead, he stared at the sharp incisors in Kougaiji’s mouth, revealed when he smiled at one of his own anecdotes. They looked sharp and deadly. Gojyo’s own teeth ached, the pain lancing through his jaw and he raised a shaky finger to his lips. His teeth were normal, as human as they had ever been.

“Gojyo?” A claw tipped hand was holding his, fingertips warm despite the chill of the water. He looked up into eyes a deeper, darker shade of red than his own, the worry clearly visible. “Sha Gojyo.” He corrected, moving his hand so that it was splayed against Kougaiji’s, the demon’s fingers shorter than his own but more deadly with their long, sharpened claws.

“Sha Gojyo.” Kougaiji repeated with a smile. “Sha Jien’s little brother.” 

“That’s right.” Gojyo said, cocking his head to the side. His stomach was feeling much better now, had been in fact since his initial immersion in the stream. The water flowing past him felt comforting and enveloping, like a parent’s warm embrace. His head was still aching and cloudy but it was clearing with every word out of Kougaiji’s mouth. “Sha Jien’s _hanyou_ little brother.” 

“Friend of Cho Hakkai and Son Goku,” Gojyo said with rising clarity, “and of the shitty monk too.” This last was said with a wry grimace of a smile and Kougaiji smiled in response, then he jumped as a fish nibbled at his toe. Gojyo burst out laughing, feeling more like himself than he had in days. 

“You’re a fire demon,” he said, as he looked Kougaiji in the eyes, “what’re you doing in the water?” 

“Helping you.” Was the simple reply.

“Helping me?” He repeated, scratching at the back of his neck where his wet hair was sticking to his skin.

“Don’t do that.” Kougaiji said as he reached forwards and stopped Gojyo’s hand. Looking down into eyes the colour of red wine, Gojyo swayed forwards to press their bodies together, the habit long engrained. 

“Helping me how?” He prompted as Kougaiji stayed both still and silent. He slid one hand down the demon’s back to hold him in place.

“You are being affected by the Minus Wave.” Kougaiji said simply, not struggling in the tight embrace but not looking comfortable either. “Dokugakuji said that water would help you and Professor Hwang sprayed me with something that’s supposed to help youkai resist the effects.” He blinked slowly, “I wasn’t sure that it would work on you, but I couldn’t tell her that it was for a hanyou as there aren’t enough of you in existence for it not to be suspicious.” Gojyo nodded, his head clearing even further as he filled his lungs.

“You smell good enough to eat.” He said with a sly grin, “And I don’t mean in the tartare sense.” He slid the hand currently resting on Kougaiji’s back down to caress his ass in case his meaning wasn’t clear. 

**--**--**

Kougaiji’s blood was starting to heat up with every caress of Gojyo’s hands. Dokugakuji had mentioned that it might come to this and Cho Hakkai had hinted as well with his pervert comment. He wondered vaguely if Gojyo’s demon affinity might be lust, in the same way that his was fire, Yaone’s was chemicals and Dokugakuji’s was strength. 

Hesitantly, Kougaiji raised his arms and embraced Gojyo. He tried to justify it by telling himself that Professor Hwang had probably spiked the chemicals she’d sprayed him with, but it sounded hollow even to his own mind. Firmly, he pushed his thoughts down and concentrated on the man before him, the man who didn’t expect anything of him, who wasn’t doing this to further his own agenda’s. It was a rare enough occurrence that Kougaiji wasn’t going to waste it.

Their lips met in a mesmerising dance and Kougaiji’s heart raced, the blood pumping south so fast that he was left feeling distinctly light headed. He could feel Gojyo’s arousal twitching against his belly, hardening slowly and pressing against him. He longed to touch it, to taste it, to experience it. He moaned, pressing himself more tightly against Gojyo’s wiry frame. The water no longer seemed cold to his overheated body and it helped to support him as his knees shook as the other man stole the breath from his lungs.

“Gojyo.” He managed to mumble between kisses and the hanyou pulled back slightly, lips the barest hairs breadth from Kougaiji’s own. “Your highness?” He breathed and Kougaiji stiffened in his arms, unable to help himself. Gojyo laughed and kissed him again. “Another fish?” Kougaiji nodded after a moment’s thought, accepting the easy way out. He looked up into blood red eyes that didn’t believe the lie either and crushed their lips together again, chasing oblivion. 

“I need solid ground.” He said when he came up for air again and Gojyo nodded, his wet hair sticking to his shoulders in bloody streaks. He squeaked in a distinctly unmanly way when Gojyo swept him off his feet and carried him, assisted by the water, over to the grassy bank. He didn’t climb out of the water, merely set his back against the soft grass. “Much better.”

The water here was shallower, only mid-thigh deep, and Kougaiji was very aware of his erection standing up straight and proud in the clear night air. He could feel Gojyo’s eyes raking over him, the sensation ratcheting up his heart rate until he was sure that it would beat straight out of his chest. 

“Turn around.” Gojyo said to him in a voice thick with lust and his heart skipped a beat in shock. Sucking in a breath to protest, he was suddenly struck by the thought that no-one would ever have to know about his little tryst, he could do whatever he wanted to without censure. He turned around slowly, the scent of crushed grass filling his nose and his hair twisting around his body as he did so.

“Beautiful.” Soft hands trailed along his shoulders and upper back, stroking his hair and tickling his skin. 

“My mother always thought so.” He volunteered, comforted by the strokes, yet still aroused by Gojyo’s presence behind him.

**--**--**

Gojyo lowered his face and licked a stripe along Kougaiji’s spine, the demon prince quivering beneath him. Who would’ve thought that the uptight bastard who had stolen his brother would be so responsive? He palmed the other man’s arousal, enjoying the shivers and moans of pleasure, and then he lowered his head to lick the back of the man’s balls. A wordless yelp greeted his efforts and he grinned to himself, it was like riding a bike, you never forgot what to do.

“Brace yourself.” He mumbled as he dragged his tongue from the drawn-up balls, over the perineum and up to his goal. He swirled his tongue insistently around the tight pucker, spreading saliva and making Kougaiji moan wantonly. It was a heady sensation, the power he held over someone in this position, and he relished it, licking and sucking until Kougaiji was begging him for more, breathless with desire.

He used his fingers first, pushing in and stretching the tight muscles, first one finger, then two, then three. There was no lube, spit and pre-cum were all that he had and he hoped vainly that they would be enough. The best he could hope for was that this was an activity that Kougaiji indulged in frequently, his body loose and accommodating.

It wasn’t.

He groaned in time with the demon prince as he pushed in inexorably, the lubrication not nearly enough. “Don’t stop.” Kougaiji ordered him several times when he faltered and he had to be reminded that youkai were tougher than humans. He focused on the fascinating strands of Kougaiji’s long red hair, darker than his own and an acceptable colour, in an effort to direct his mind away from his cock.

“Kami.” He whispered when he hilted, sweating and panting despite the chill and forgetting everything except the extreme tightness. “Kougaiji.” The man beneath him shivered at the sound of his name and wriggled his hips sinuously, clearly a plea for him to move. He obliged, still moving with agonising slowness, the water swirling around his thighs and his breath rasping in his throat.

The pleasure buzzing along his nerves increased along with the speed, each thrust faster than the one before it until he was moving with enough force to pry a grunt from his throat each time he hilted. The water was splashing around them with the vigour of his thrusts and their flesh slapped together wetly in time to Kougaiji’s moans. It was intensely arousing and Gojyo realised that he wasn’t going to last much longer. He reached a hand around to grasp the other man’s erection and started jerking it roughly making the other man cry and out and clench around him.

**--**--**

Kougaiji felt rung out and boneless after his intense orgasm. He was slumped against the grassy bank breathing heavily and soaked with sweat. Gojyo had collapsed next to him, gasping and complaining mildly about the lack of his cigarettes. His ass ached, but in a pleasant way that suggested he would remember this encounter for quite some time, but that wouldn’t leave him incapacitated.

Sliding down the bank and into the water, he sculled backwards to rinse the sweat from his body and the grass from his hair. If Gojyo’s complaints were anything to go by, the hanyou was back to his normal self, and would probably stay that way for the time being. He felt quite proud of his actions, saving Dokugakuji’s little brother and ensuring that the Sanzo Ikkou would be together to continue their running battles, it just wouldn’t be the same if it was four against three.

Gojyo was watching him hungrily from the bank and Kougaiji smiled seductively as he beckoned the hanyou forwards, just because the man was back to his old self was no reason not to continue the medication, especially as dawn was still hours away yet and he didn’t know when he would get an opportunity like this again.

**--**--**

Gojyo strode back to where he thought the camp was just as false dawn lit the horizon. He felt deliciously relaxed and at peace with the world. The last few days were hazy, but his memories of last night were nearly sharp enough to taste. He whistled a happy little tune as spotted the tents and headed towards them.

A shot broke the stillness of the pre-dawn and dirt puffed up in a little cloud by Gojyo’s left shoe. “Where the hell’s the fish for my breakfast you damn cockroach.” Sanzo cocked the gun again and Gojyo threw up his hands in a placating gesture. Goku’s head poked around the monk’s shoulder and stared at him for a long breathless moment and then the boy shot out of the tent and started teasing him about his crappy fishing skills.

“I’m glad to see that everyone is so lively this morning.” Hakkai said pleasantly as he emerged from his tent with Hakuryu balancing on his shoulder and looking sleepy. Gojyo gave him a big grin and presented him with a large bundle of watercress. “Thanks for looking after me Hakkai,” he said quietly, “I feel much better now.”

The End.


End file.
